Fortis Academy
I love jalapenos. No, seriously. Stop laughing. I buy them weekly from my local grocery store, and I take them out for dinner, and to the movies, and stuff. Then, a day before I have to buy new ones, I chop them up and plot them into a delicious salsa dip and have a funeral for them. I have a lot of sad salsa funerals.
My neighbors think I’m a nut job, but I’m not. I’m a pepper job. They don’t know what it’s like to swoon at the sight of a serrano or pucker up to a poblano.
But the real love of my life is a batch of fresh, organic jalapenos. Why? Because they’re spicy. They’re rebellious. They don’t play by your rules. If you doublecross a jalapeno, you get the seeds.
They’re also just really cool peppers. That ñ is off the chain. FIN.
Just kidding. It’s not over yet. Calvin can’t stop his pen, so I’ll profess my love to the jalapeno some more.
Why do I love thee? Let me count the ways:
My neighbors think I’m a nut job, but I’m not. I’m a pepper job. They don’t know what it’s like to swoon at the sight of a serrano or pucker up to a poblano.
But the real love of my life is a batch of fresh, organic jalapenos. Why? Because they’re spicy. They’re rebellious. They don’t play by your rules. If you doublecross a jalapeno, you get the seeds.
They’re also just really cool peppers. That ñ is off the chain. FIN.
Just kidding. It’s not over yet. Calvin can’t stop his pen, so I’ll profess my love to the jalapeno some more.
Why do I love thee? Let me count the ways:
- spicyness
- green-ness
- etc.
